"LETS ALL GO TO TESCO'S..."

Someone I know insisted that I should join the Tesco clubcard scheme "you have to spend lots in Tesco's why don't you join up you can get free offers and everything" I was told. I have to say i have always been suspicious of free offers but it was worth a try I thought so i signed up (under someone else's name - I don't want their rubbish through my letter box as well, its bad enough with all the Pizza menu's).
Now, fourteen hundred odd-quid later I am the holder of two £5 petrol tokens not bad eh? Except that I don't have a car and I don't drive, and if I did have a car it would cost me about fiver in petrol getting to the nearest Tesco garage which is miles away, I thought the garage in Maida vale was a Tesco, but its only a Tesco shop on an oil Companies forecourt. So even that's no good.
I didn't really expect to receive letters through the post stuffed with free food offers but I didn't expect it to be so useless either. So far out of all the 'exciting offers' I have received the 25p yoghurt one was the most useful, even then I didn't take the offer up. I'm not moaning that they aren't giving me enough for free, I'm moaning that they're giving me things it is obvious that I obviously don't blinking want for flips sake, as could be found out by checking what produce I had purchased.
Tesco collects, collates and analysis the purchases of every clubcard member and that's supposed to reflected in the offers they give out, but the tokens I have just received can only of been picked at random by something who was also picked out to do the job at random (?!), I wont use any of them, and while it is nice to go around playing the big daddy giver bestowing Muller pot 40p off tokens on friends I cant say that I'm bowled over by Tesco's generosity. Now if they just gave me what they would of spent on paper, postage, printing etc I might be tempted to change my mind but I reckon their next bundle of flashy packaged offers will be ending up in the bright orange bags with the last couple of lots no matter how many 'happy family on a beautiful day' pictures they put on them.
Tightwads.