KILL EVERY ANIMAL BEFORE THEY TRY TO KILL US.

BUM BITING A.I.D.S RATS AND OTHER MURDEROUS ANIMALS WE SHOULD ALL BE FEARING, NOW!!!
I was going through the past weeks newspapers, looking for odd and silly stories, even though the papers are almost all just filled with the same old tales of yet another talent starved member of our new idiot pop royalty having a paid for, publicist revealed, public relationship crisis, or Jordan is pictured pissed, looking more like a bad male transexual than last time she was snapped, with her plastic monsters drunkenly hanging out yet again on cue, in a manner that suggests that we actually want to see them. She has become so extreme looking that even her new cage fighting bloke looks more like a real woman when he is dressed in his Viz comic 'Tranny Magnet' ensemble than she does when 'glammed up' for a night out.
But this week I was horrified by the way the papers carried the 'Fox bites babies' stories, I had only heard of the story by word of mouth and on BBC radio4 newscasts (no I am not an Archers fan. Dont, make me repeat myself.). When I read how frothed up the reporting in the papers was and saw the pictures of teeth baring 'vicious' foxs I almost thought it was a different case. It would be an understatement to say that the media are relying on the general publics lack of knowledge regarding animal behaviour to whip up illogical, ignorant fears, then on the stories last page there's a quarter page ad for (then) tomorrows edition, one that will be giving out 'expert advice' on how to make you feel safe in your own home once again (aren't they kind).
The red tops especially have been going full steam from the 'we're not safe in our beds' angle, Using photos of animals in apparent 'snarling' poses, showing their teeth as if about to attack the camera, and through the camera you, YOU! and generally making out that at any moment a person bedding down for the night is at risk of being torn to shreds and eaten the moment they lay down and close their eyes, torn and painfully eaten alive in the one place we are supposed to feel most at ease in. If we're not safe in bed then we're all doomed I say, doomed!!!
They are just like the scare stories in the 90's that were circulated by opponents of the Lighthouse AIDS hospice being opened on Lancaster road, who had spread stories that Rats who has eaten AIDS tainted pooh washed from the hospice toilets were going to jump out of the toilet and bite peoples bottoms (its true, I was even warned) giving them AIDS. Like then, we are given the impression that any number of rabid vicious animals are there, hidden, unseen in dark recesses. Licking their lips while they watch you for any weakness, like a limp, or you lagging behind your other half as you both carry the shopping home.
If we were to believe the papers then we need to kill every animal now, big and small, before they kill us. They're just waiting for the opportunity, see how your neighbours cat looks at you? thats a killer stare that is.